Stuck in a Furrow
Thursday, March 01, 2007
...is my Shepherd....
Today is probably my least favourite day of the year. I can't help but wake up feeling a little sad and out of sorts. It was 5 years ago today that Corey died. In some ways, it feels like just last week when I got that phonecall from mom and in others, it feels like forever. I miss him, we had a special bond that went beyond uncle to friend, mentor, boss and so much more. Today I contemplated going out to his grave but I am not sure I can. I have some great memories of him and I'm afraid that one day, I'll forget these so I try to think of him often. Some of these memeories are too hard for me to even type as the tears build up and roll down my cheeks.
I remember playing the "That's Gross" game with him. He always won with a trump card which always prompted me to exclaim "That's Gross!". I never won. I still don't.
I remember spending the week with him and Sue at camp after Jordan was born.
I remember him taking my car for a drive with Grandma and scaring the pants off of her.
I remember watching Family Guy when Sue wasn't home.
I remember going for "screws" everyday at 3 during the summer and having to stop for cokes because we deserved it.
I remember him not leting me run out the door to meet Jared. He made him come to the door like a real date. I remember the awkward kissing talks.
I remember how proud he was when he pulled off my 16th birthday present at the school without me knowing.
I remember him, shortly after I moved in, siting on my bed and not saying a word. The tears were streaming down his cheeks. I knew he was crying for me.
I remember our talks of life and God and relantionships and everything that made a 17 year old girl afraid. He never laughed at me but he did cry with me.
I remember that he didn't put sugar on his grapefruit and I thought that it was wierd.
I remember the depressing birthday song and the dump truck song he sang to Jordan.
I remember him letting Craig and I hide in the backseat of his car when he picked up his girlfriend. We would jump out and scare her and it made us laugh.
I remember him teaching me how to vaccinate the lambs.
I remember so many things, some of them obscure and a passing thought. I remember grandpa crying as we sat around their house, remembering Corey and singing through our tears.
Here I am, once again
I pour out my heart
For I know that You hear
Every cry
You are listening
No matter what state my heart is in
You are faithful to answer
With words that are true
And a hope that is real
As I feel Your touch
You bring a freedom
To all that’s within
In the safety of this place
I’m longing to ...
Pour out my heart
To say that I love You
Pour out my heart
To say that I need You
Pour out my heart
To say that I’m thankful
Pour out my heart
To say that You’re wonderful.
I remember playing the "That's Gross" game with him. He always won with a trump card which always prompted me to exclaim "That's Gross!". I never won. I still don't.
I remember spending the week with him and Sue at camp after Jordan was born.
I remember him taking my car for a drive with Grandma and scaring the pants off of her.
I remember watching Family Guy when Sue wasn't home.
I remember going for "screws" everyday at 3 during the summer and having to stop for cokes because we deserved it.
I remember him not leting me run out the door to meet Jared. He made him come to the door like a real date. I remember the awkward kissing talks.
I remember how proud he was when he pulled off my 16th birthday present at the school without me knowing.
I remember him, shortly after I moved in, siting on my bed and not saying a word. The tears were streaming down his cheeks. I knew he was crying for me.
I remember our talks of life and God and relantionships and everything that made a 17 year old girl afraid. He never laughed at me but he did cry with me.
I remember that he didn't put sugar on his grapefruit and I thought that it was wierd.
I remember the depressing birthday song and the dump truck song he sang to Jordan.
I remember him letting Craig and I hide in the backseat of his car when he picked up his girlfriend. We would jump out and scare her and it made us laugh.
I remember him teaching me how to vaccinate the lambs.
I remember so many things, some of them obscure and a passing thought. I remember grandpa crying as we sat around their house, remembering Corey and singing through our tears.
Here I am, once again
I pour out my heart
For I know that You hear
Every cry
You are listening
No matter what state my heart is in
You are faithful to answer
With words that are true
And a hope that is real
As I feel Your touch
You bring a freedom
To all that’s within
In the safety of this place
I’m longing to ...
Pour out my heart
To say that I love You
Pour out my heart
To say that I need You
Pour out my heart
To say that I’m thankful
Pour out my heart
To say that You’re wonderful.
posted by Crystal at 6:52 AM
4 Comments:
I miss Uncle Cory too. I'm glad I have the Narnia books and the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy books that he gave me (or us). It's a great reminder of him, what was important to him and what an oddball he could be.
I am sometimes very jealous of the time you got to spend with him. He tried to spend time with me after our move to Calgary but I must say I didn't value that time like I should have.
I remember him telling me to put chicken shit under my lip to grow hair there, or meeting him at Sue at the airport when they got back from Kenya with chicken feather leis. I remember him and dad talking about 'rubbers', the rubber handles on their hammers of course and them thinking I didn't know what they were talking about. I remember when I spent some time with him at the camp and the fun we have. I can't believe how long it's been.
Okay, I have to stop or I will cry at work.
Wow! This is hard to do at work, glad I have my own office.
Just last night I put on our shelf a picture of Corey and dad laughing and having a coffee. So many memories and his mannerisms I remember and see in Craig sometimes. His laugh was most infectious as he rubbed his itchy beard. The news was horrid and sometimes remembering it unfold weighs down the memories I choose to remember. Maybe the family or whoever wants to should write down our memories and put a little book together so we don't forget, eh Crystal?
I barely knew your uncle so is it weird that I miss him too? I think there are some people in the world that are able to make such an impact on so many people and he was definitely one of them! He was not here long enough.
If you need help designing and printing that book let me know.
Wow hat was great Crystal.. He was a great Brother, FriendBeing older I used to tease him and he always took it but got back later.I miss him so much. your memories made me cry again. This week I was at the chicken meetings.. And seeing his peers from the boards and the people he worked with reminder me how mature and what a great leader he was. I even had someone mention him and that as so good on the board.
I miss him .. We should maybe go see the grave site this weekend? Will be tough but would be good.
Grandpa and grandma would loe to go I bet
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